My dreams disappoint me

I am disappointed with my dreams. Considering the massive amount of material that should be available to my brain, the result is mediocre. At best. And I am double disappointed because a lot of my dreams actually look great. But it’s all surface. There is nothing really exciting about my dreams.  

Last night I dreamt that I was sitting on the stairs on the back of the house looking out over the garden. Suddenly a strange creature appeared on the lawn near the outhouse. It was roughly 1 meter high, completely white and with a body that was human-like but still reminiscent of a tall slender tree. Its face was dominated by a strange etheral grin and on top of his head there was a huge and wildly growing crown of hair. It looked like a weekend painter’s attempt at mixing up a Gothic image of an angel with one of the annoying elfs from Gnomeo and Juliet. I called on my wife to come and marvel at the amazing creature before it disappeared. As she came out into the garden, I stretched out my arm and did an E.T. finger to finger with the creature, whose facial expression was still fixed in an etheral grin. As soon as our fingertips touched each other, a transformation occurred. I was now the creature and it had taken over my body. Except I was not white. In my new angel-like elf-body, I had acquired a brownish color as if I had somehow carried some contaminated dark stuff from my earlier body and into the new one. But more importantly, the creature had tricked me and I was now caught in a twilight existence as a dirty angel.

When I woke up, I was initially so excited about the dream. It seemed like a genuine David Lynch dream where a subconscious murky world peopled by strange and bizarre creatures invade and momentarily take over my thoughts. But I am afraid that my dream world is much more  predictable and mundane than that.

I think that the dream is a symbolically suggests that I am going through a transformation. The white creature is a manifestation of the dream-like etheral promises of that transformation. And then it tricks me and I realise that it is not as simple and straight-forward as I had expected. Could the transformation have anything to do with, say, my project of quitting alcohol? Well, as crazy as that idea may sound, I certainly think so.

Isn’t that just the most insanely boring 1:1 symbolisation that any dream has ever come up with? When I realised that this is probably what was going on last night, I was so disappointed. The dream didn’t contribute with anything other than a mild warning: You might find that the process you are going through is more complicated that you think.

And, to be honest, I don’t even think of this project of quitting alcohol as a process of transformation. It’s more like peeling away layers. Almost like cutting away slabs that are no longer necessary. Why didn't my dream talk about that?

The first time I got drunk

My perfect life